by Golda Poretsky, HHC
Take a moment to connect with one of your deepest desires. Really connect with that desire right now.
Now, take a moment to think or say aloud: “I deserve ____(that desire)____.”
How did that feel? Did it feel like the truth? Did it feel okay to say that you really deserve one of your deepest desires?
If it felt right, if you felt aligned with that statement, then I am so happy for you. This article may not be for you then.
But if it felt funny, or weird, or wrong, or guilt-inducing to say “I deserve this deep desire” then you should definitely read on.
Most of us think of being deserving from a scarcity perspective. On some level we think, that if we find ourselves deserving, we’re implying that others are not. But feeling that we’re deserving has nothing to do with others not being deserving. Feeling deserving just means that we are willing to honor and take heed of our own needs and desires. When you don’t feel deserving, you create your own self-imposed obstacle to creating positive change and having what you want.
Deciding that you’re deserving can sometimes feel selfish. You may feel like, “Well, if I’m deserving of this, isn’t everybody? Why should I have wonderful food while others go hungry? Why should I love my body and approve of it when so many people hate theirs?”
But thinking this way does not serve anyone. If you eat food that you don’t really like because others are hungry, both you and those hungry folks are miserable, right? If you hate your body because other people don’t know that it’s possible to stop hating theirs, who are you serving? You are only serving your inner critic. You are only serving the belief in scarcity that keeps you afraid to change and follow your desires.
Feeling deserving is not selfish, it is self-empowering. Deciding that you’re deserving of love, or good food, or joyous movement or a better job is self-empowering. When you find yourself worthy of what you want, when you become in alignment with what you want, you have the energy to take care of yourself, of your needs, of your wants. And that energy can change the world for the better. See for yourself how this small mindset shift can create big change.
Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.
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