This Is Thin Privilege: Why Melissa McCarthy Makes “This Is 40” Worth Watching

Melissa McCarthy steals the show in “This Is 40”
melissa mccarthy this is 40 principals office scene paul rudd leslie mann pete debbie

Those of you who read this blog often know that I’m kind of a comedy nerd. Even though I often find Judd Apatow movies somewhat sexist, I still watch them to see some of my favorite comedic actors doing their thing. And also, I’ve had a thing for Paul Rudd since Clueless, as my pinterest boards can attest.

I had also heard that Melissa McCarthy (whom I adore) had a small, extremely funny role in it, which made me want to see it all the more.

Even though I had heard not such great things about This Is 40, I went to see it this weekend and liked it much more than I expected. But the real standout for me was, not surprisingly, a scene with Melissa McCarthy. I’m putting a MILD SPOILER ALERT here, but only a tiny part of the movie will be spoiled by this discussion.

So, as you probably know, the movie focuses on the lives of Debbie (Leslie Mann) and Pete (Paul Rudd). They have two daughters, 13-year-old Sadie (Maude Apatow) and 8-year-old Charlotte (Iris Apatow). At one point in the movie, Debbie and Pete take away Sadie’s electronics, and they read her iChats or facebook feed or both (I think that’s a minor inconsistency in the movie) and see an argument between Sadie and Joseph (Ryan Lee). Later on, Debbie confronts Joseph at school, saying pretty bizarre and awful stuff and actually making the kid cry. Then Joseph’s mom, Catherine (played by Melissa McCarthy), gets into an argument with Pete at school because she’s angry that Debbie yelled at her kid.

Here’s where things get interesting. Debbie, Pete, and Catherine all get a called into the principal’s office to talk about what happened. In this principal’s office scene, Catherine/Melissa McCarthy starts out telling the absolute truth about what Debbie said to her son. Pete and Debbie admit to nothing, acting calmer than they act in the entire movie, and denying everything that Catherine is saying. The principal (Joanne Baron) seems to take Pete and Debbie’s side right away, even chiding Catherine for her use of offensive language when she’s repeating what Pete and Debbie had said to her and her kid.

This whole scenario makes Catherine angrier and angrier, which vaults her into a hilarious ad hominem attack on Pete and Debbie. She says, “Maybe if I looked more like this fake bullshit couple — it looks like they’re in a bank commercial.” Turning to Debbie and Pete, she says, “That’s what you look like. Like you’re a bullshit bank commercial couple.”

[EDIT: The video of the scene is below for the time being! I’m disputing my ability to use it under the fair use doctrine. If it disappears or you can’t see it, then it’s being blocked by youtube.]

Of course, this is a comedy, and this scene is just a tiny scene. It’s meant to be funny. And, as a viewer, I know I’m supposed to side with Pete and Debbie. They are the protagonists, the characters we’ve been watching all along. I’m supposed to enjoy this as evidence that despite their own relationship issues, they’re banding together against a common enemy, and coming out on top. Yay for Pete and Debbie!

Instead, however, I completely sided with Catherine. I felt her anger. I felt the way she was getting labeled as the unhinged, aggressive mom because she was fat and angry and dealing with an attractive “bullshit bank commercial couple” who were able to act calm because they knew going into it that the principal would probably side with them. It’s essentially a perfect scene about how thin privilege works, and it made me think about a recent study about how fat female defendants are viewed as more likely to be guilty than thin, female defendants.

Critics have noted that it’s hard to feel bad for Pete and Debbie. Despite the very real financial struggles that get talked about (his record label is going down the tubes, her store is barely breaking even), it doesn’t stop them from having big catered birthday parties, weekend getaways at expensive looking hotels, etc. Similarly, their relationship problems seem mostly self-imposed — if they would stop trying to cut out cupcakes and the occasional cigarette and give each other a break about it, things would be much improved. (We could also talk about how the “fear of fat” part of fat stigma is probably why Debbie is so fixated on Pete’s “cupcake addiction”, but perhaps that’s fodder for another post.)

So, have you seen this movie? Do you intend to? Can you think of another movie where thin privilege is highlighted in this way? I’d love to hear from you in the comments section below!

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Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.


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20 thoughts on “This Is Thin Privilege: Why Melissa McCarthy Makes “This Is 40” Worth Watching

  1. I recall that age, when every where I had to go to deal with every little piece of crap life can hand out to everyone, fat and thin — I would be on guard because I knew my image and any crossness of demeanor would be judged, not my words or the truth. Now I am older and not so liable to go there but those were the days, definitely. They made me stronger and less naive.

  2. When I was working at a casino as a bartender, I wasn’t as big as I am now. I was an inbetweenie. Of course I still thought I was the size of Jupiter, but that’s beside the point.
    There was a former stripper who was working at said casino as a cocktail waitress. Anytime any little thing would happen and she had to take time off, bada bing, time off, no problemo.
    One day I was 20 minutes late because I couldn’t find my keys. The manager chewed me out right in front of the customers. I became furious. I told him that unless he wanted to be tending my bar, he’d best never yell at me again, especially in front of other people.
    I knew full well he was giving me shit because I wasn’t a cute little thing with a big rack who batted my eyes and got what I wanted from men.
    This kind of thing happens all the time. Yeah, I’m savvy enough to know “that’s the way it goes.” But I’m also smart enough to know that it shouldn’t be this way.

  3. Wow, Golda, I got chills reading this. You totally hit the nail on the head. As someone who is a relative newcomer to FA, I haven’t as yet heard this subject, a subject I think about two, three times or more a week at work when I sense that I have to work twice as hard not to come across as aggressive and to seem appropriately submissive so I don’t come across as insubordinate or a loud, “too assertive” fattie. I can’t even articulate how this unspoken dynamic is imposed, it is just that often I feel like people’s body language or subtext of their words are dismissive and since I was a child, I have been told that I “scare people” because they think I could “beat them up.” As a pacifist who literally doesn’t kill spiders, this has always kind of hurt me in a deep way, but I digress. I am just so thankful for your work and your insight.

    And one more, hopefully quick note about Melissa McCarthy and my absolute almost worship of everything she does. I have a degree in acting, a fairly competitive and hard earned one, but I was told time and time again that I would never make it because I am fat, by acting teachers and professors, by fellow students, and then when I started auditioning, by casting directors. I feel fairly qualified to comment on the amount of pure guts MM has for being absolutely fearless as an actress, and I am looking forward to her becoming a bigger and bigger star as I have a good feeling she will continue to be. She is a Goddess in my book.

  4. To be honest, I didn’t think ANYthing could make “This is 40” worth watching, but the Melissa McCarthy bit was one of the few parts of it that were worth watching. She was awesome as usual, and the outtakes at the end with the credits were hysterical. Like you, I was appalled at how her character was treated. But then, I did not identify with the protagonists at all at any point of the movie. Struck me as a couple of over-privileged, self-centered twits.

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