On a personal note, I realize that the question “is it okay to be fat?” is insulting and obnoxious. However, I think this will be a great chance to have our voices be heard and support wonderful advocates like Marianne Kirby and Crystal Renn.

Please comment below [send me a message by clicking here] if you would like to go as a group.  If we have enough people, we’ll get a special reserved spot in the audience.  I will post a meeting place closer to the date!

You can also let us know you’re coming on Facebook by clicking here:

**MEDIA ALERT**

IS IT OKAY TO BE FAT?  QUESTION DEBATED IN A “NIGHTLINE FACE OFF”

CYNTHIA MCFADDEN MODERATES LIVE DEBATE AT THE COOPER UNION’S GREAT HALL IN NEW YORK CITY

ON FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 5^th AT 4:00PM ET

“FACE-OFF” TO AIR ON “NIGHTLINE”

MONDAY, FEBRUARY 22^nd

Is it Okay to be Fat? “Nightline” tackles this question and other delicate questions related to dieting and obesity and how it relates to heath in a “Face Off” to air Monday, February 22. This will be the program’s fifth “Face-Off,” a series launched two years ago that is a debate style format where hot topics get discussed among prominent voices in their field. (more…)

by Golda Poretsky, H.H.C.
www.bodylovewellness.com

Listen to the podcast of this post here:

When I first heard V Magazine was producing an issue featuring plus sized models, I was non-plussed (lame pun intended).  For my own sanity, I tend to avoid fashion magazines.  And for whatever reason, I thought that plus sized models were sometimes in fashion magazines anyway.  At the very least, they’re in the plus sized section of department store web sites and attached to the Lane Bryant coupons that I receive with some regularity.  Okay, if I’m to be honest, I haven’t thought much about plus sized models since my beloved Mode Magazine died in 2001.

That is not to say that I’m not glad that plus sized models exist.  I am so glad that they exist.  I’m so glad that gorgeous plus sized models like Crystal Renn are out there, being gorgeous and writing about healing from eating disorders.  The more that plus size models work their way into mainstream media, and the more that they are seen as beautiful, the more hope I have that more young women will grow up loving their curvaceousness and not spending money on diet programs and diet pills.

But can I just say, (more…)

by Golda Poretsky, H.H.C.
www.bodylovewellness.com

Listen to the podcast of this post here:

This morning, when I was cleaning out my office, I came across this postcard:

It is now on the wall of my office, where it should have been all along!  It is one of the best pieces of mail I have ever received, sent to me by one of my very pleased and (very wonderful) clients.

It’s so appropriate that this postcard has resurfaced in my life at this time of year, when the media is awash in “health information” that so many of us internalize into really negative, judgmental, painful resolutions.  This time of year, when new seasons of shows like The Biggest Loser, so calculated to feed on our collective guilt and shame, make heroes of obnoxious, diet pill hawking trainers.  This time of year, when we’re told that our merriment of a few weeks ago is over and it’s time to “stick to a plan”, “get back to the gym”, “get our bodies ready” for the swimsuits that are waiting for us in our closets, taunting us until their use can throw us into more guilt and shame.

In other words, “Repent ye sinners!  For ye have been cast from Eden for the sin of drinking the egg nog of the Tree of Knowledge!  Now drop and give me 20 squat thrusts and hand over that cupcake!” (more…)

by Golda Poretsky, H.H.C.
www.bodylovewellness.com

Listen to the podcast of this post here:

Every once in a while, a commenter will despair that one of my tips is not based in reality. I often ask people to love themselves more, to focus on their desires, to trust themselves, and for some readers, it feels like I’m asking the impossible. In essence, they ask, “Why should I think things about myself that I know aren’t true?” And my usual response, to paraphrase, is “because truth is often relative.”

This summer, I wrote about how the show More To Love depicted a world where plus-sized women, by mere virtue of being plus-sized, couldn’t find meaningful relationships. And I asked many of you to think about whether this reality was really your reality.

So the question I’d like to pose to you is, do the thoughts and assumptions posited in [More To Love] really reflect reality?

I have fat friends who are married and are in committed relationships. I also have fat friends who are single and dating or single and not dating all that much. I also have thin friends who are married and in committed relationships and thin friends who are single and dating or single and not dating all that much. I have thin friends who have been dumped for no reason or bad reasons or mean reasons, and I have fat friends who have been dumped for no reason or bad reasons or mean reasons.

I know that I can’t be the only one with friends like this. People run into issues with dating and relationships. Fat, thin or in between.

Perhaps even more troubling than More To Love, is the incredibly popular show Biggest Loser.  Now in its eighth (!) season, (more…)

Like many of you out in More Of Me To Love land, I watched the first episode of More To Love last Tuesday. I was all set to avoid the show entirely, when a very savvy friend of mine who owns a very awesome plus sized vintage store reminded me that my clients would be watching and probably interested in discussing the show.

She was right, and I’m glad I watched it, mainly for the fatshion and the fact that it gave me some food for thought, as it were.

For those of you who didn’t see it, More To Love is a “Bachelor” type show, where 20 or so women are vying for one bachelor. Women get eliminated in every episode until the bachelor chooses the final one, to whom he’ll likely propose. In this instance, the “Bachelor” is fat and all of the contestants are fat as well (despite not wanting to think of themselves that way).

Generally, I avoid “Bachelor” type shows as much as possible. I hate to see a bunch of women fighting over one guy in a desperate attempt to get married and score a bunch of money.

As a viewer, however, I find that it’s easy to get sucked into this view of the world. It’s easy to begin to believe in and connect with the view that potential mates are scarce, that dates and relationships are prizes to be desperately attracted, latched on to and kept at all costs – and that finding that right person is the only way to finally become complete.

What More To Love does is couch the hopelessness that people often feel when looking for relationships into something that is specifically caused by size. Again and again, the show’s contestants would talk about how all their skinny friends get the guys, how they’ve been dumped or never had a relationship, and how hard it is to find a guy who loves them for who they are. All of this is blamed on their sizes.

So the question I’d like to pose to you is, do the thoughts and assumptions posited in this show really reflect reality?

I have fat friends who are married and are in committed relationships. I also have fat friends who are single and dating or single and not dating all that much. I also have thin friends who are married and in committed relationships and thin friends who are single and dating or single and not dating all that much. I have thin friends who have been dumped for no reason or bad reasons or mean reasons, and I have fat friends who have been dumped for no reason or bad reasons or mean reasons.

I know that I can’t be the only one with friends like this. People run into issues with dating and relationships. Fat, thin or in between.

If you find yourself thinking that you’ll never have a great relationship because of your size, I want you take that assumption and turn it around. I guarantee that you know someone who is fat and has a great relationship or lots of fun dating. Rather than thinking that can never be you, spend more time with this friend or friends; see what that person does, ask for tips, ask if they’ll be your wingman or wingwoman. Toss out the assumptions and fake reality of so-called reality shows, and create your own reality with you as the star of the show!

(By the way, fellow New Yorkers, I am a fat-tastic wingwoman.)

Please stop by my Facebook group and become a member of the Body Love Wellness Group! Also, I would love it if you would follow me on Twitter!

And check out the other experts’ great tips this week.