+

370x231px HAES for the holidays spring edition banner with click here for more infoEaster and Passover are almost here. Did you ever notice that the holidays can bring up a lot of . . . stuff?

Being with family can mean being scrutinized about your weight, your food choices, and even bigger life choices.

Whether you come from a family of constant dieters or one where cleaning your plate is the best way to show love, navigating your way through the holiday season can feel more pressured and stressful than anything else.

Wouldn’t it be fabulous to have more fun this holiday? Wouldn’t it be lovely to have the tools you need so that you can have a really joyous holiday?

If so, I think you should check out my new, super-affordable e-course, HAES® For The Holidays! I’ve specifically designed an e-course to give you the body positive, loving support you deserve. All of the content is designed to align with Health At Every Size® (HAES®) practices.

We get started really soon, so don’t delay!

For full details, click here!

Happy HAES® Holidays!

{ 5 comments }

I’m so excited that another wonderful fat activist has shared her wisdom via a TEDx talk!

Check out Jill Andrew’s powerful, brilliant, evocative talk. (You may know her from her awesome blog, Fat In The City.)

Make sure to like it on youtube too. You know the trolls will get hold of this eventually, so let’s give it tons of likes!

{ 6 comments }

Yum! Capuccino Date. (Image Courtesy Of Flickr)

I’m bringing back one of my favorite posts this week.  Read the magic of dating yourself as a way of upping your self care and amplifying your attraction factor. Enjoy!

Recently, I had the pleasure of going to a lovely dinner with my friend (let’s call her Amanda). The subject turned to the topic of dating. She told me how, about a year ago, she had wanted to meet a guy but wasn’t meeting anyone who piqued her interest, so she decided to start dating herself. In essence, she decided to be her own lover. She would take herself out to restaurants that she had been dying to go to, she would buy herself flowers, write herself love letters, make beautiful dinners for herself, and enjoy sensual time with herself. She so enjoyed dating herself that she ended up attracting a really great relationship in a matter of months. She joked that she was in a polyamorous relationship — her primary relationship was with herself and her secondary relationship was with her boyfriend.

What I loved about Amanda’s story was that she kept dating herself even though she now had a boyfriend because the benefits of dating herself were so great.

So what are some of the benefits of dating yourself?

  • Dating yourself allows you to get in touch with what you really want in relationships. It allows you to connect with how you want to be loved, how you want to be touched, how much space you need, etc.
  • Dating yourself allows you to see how much you have and how much you are able to fulfill your own desires, without relying on someone else to do it for you. In essence, you realize your completeness.
  • Dating yourself allows you to assert boundaries in your relationships in an easy and loving way. Sometimes it’s easier to say, “I need to go on a date with myself” than “I need to be left alone”.
  • Dating yourself allows you to spend time enjoying the sensual pleasure of your body, which is so healing in terms of body acceptance (and so wonderful nonetheless)!
  • If you are looking for a relationship, dating yourself gives yourself a reminder of how it feels to be dating. And, as you may have found, people often get more attention from potential lovers when they’re already in a relationship. Therefore, dating yourself can actually make you more attractive because you’re already in a relationship.

In the work that I do, I often find that different techniques work for different people when it comes to increasing their sense of self love and well being. If dating yourself sounds like fun to you, I encourage you to do it! In order to support you, answer these questions and start acting on your answers. Your lover is waiting!

  • What kinds of communication would you like to get from the person you’re dating? (Consider: sexy text messages, love letters, loving voice mails.)
  • Where would you like to go on dates? (Consider: restaurants, movies, museums, parks, boatrides, at home.)
  • What kind of gifts would you like to get from a lover? (Consider: flowers, books, clothes, jewelry.)
  • What kind of sensual experiences would you like to have with a lover? (Experiment with exploring your body. There are some great books on this topic.)
  • What would you like to wear on these dates? (Consider: dressing up, lingerie, perfume, makeup, hair.)
  • How do you like to set the mood for myself? (Consider: music, baths, self massage.)

Have fun with this. Do the things that sound pleasurable to you and forget about the things that don’t. And remember, the first rule of the Body Love Club is it’s all research.

Finally, the idea of fulfilling your own desires doesn’t have to be limited to dating yourself. Pick a desire that you feel you need someone else to fulfill, and try to fulfill it yourself, even in a small way. For example, if you’re looking for a new job, perhaps you want to pay yourself for a task that you do, just to get the feeling into your body of being paid for different work.

As always, let me know how it goes in the comments section below!

And, if you want some support with loving your self and your body this February . . . check out my new, super affordable e-course, 30 Days Of Body Love, by clicking here.

Golda is a certified holistic health counselor and founder of Body Love Wellness, a program designed for plus-sized women who are fed up with dieting and want support to stop obsessing about food and weight. To learn more about Golda and her work, click here.

{ 17 comments }

30 Days Of Body Love EcourseIt’s February and love (and a bunch of snow) is in the air.

If you’re anything like I used to be, you’re probably thrilled that the polar vortex is requiring you to wear tons of layers. You may feel covered up and less insecure in your bulky winter gear.

But it’s not like your body image issues go away in the winter.

You’re probably still finding yourself:

  • Struggling to get dressed in the morning
  • Worrying about your weight and what if anything you can do to change it
  • Thinking of ways to cover up your body and camouflage “problem areas”
  • Wondering if the new folks you meet will judge you for your body
  • Asking yourself when your mother/friend/doctor will stop nagging you about your weight

Being the smart person that you are, you can often identify these questions as internalized messages about what your body “should” look like in order to be socially acceptable and worthy.

And while you can often intellectually acknowledge that these messages are wrong, you may still feel ashamed about your own body.

Wouldn’t it be really wonderful to break these negative patterns and really love your body? What else might you do, be, or have? How would you feel at a party, at work, on a date? How would you feel getting dressed in the morning?

What else could you do with all that time and energy that you normally lose to worrying about your body and feeling ashamed of it?

Whether you’ve been practicing body positivity for a while or just want to dip your toe in and see what it’s all about, I think you should check out my new, super-affordable e-course, 30 Days Of Body Love! I’ve specifically designed an e-course to give you the body positive, loving support you deserve. All of the content is designed to align with Health At Every Size® (HAES®) and fat positivity.

We get started next week, so don’t delay!

For full details, click here!

{ 5 comments }

Rachel Fredrickson at The Biggest Loser finale

Rachel Fredrickson at The Biggest Loser finale

When my Biggest Loser exposé got over 5,000 views before 10AM this morning, I knew something was up in BiggestLoserLand.

Turns out that last night, The Biggest Loser crowned a new winner, Rachel Fredrickson, who lost nearly 60% of her body weight. She went from 260 pounds to a gaunt 105 pounds to win the show.

As is typical of the rhetoric around fat, weight, and women’s bodies, Rachel was deemed “too thin” and “not healthy” by viewers and the media.

There’s a fine line in the media between too fat, just right, and too thin. If Jennifer Lawrence is too fat and Rachel Frederickson is too thin, then I’m assuming the swing is a mere 15 pounds or so.

But to those who are decrying Rachel’s weight loss as too much, I ask you, what did you think this show is about? Do you think The Biggest Loser is about health? Well-being? It’s a show that promotes weight loss at any cost.

The winner is not the person who eats reasonably, exercises moderately, and makes time for family, friends, and fun.

The winner is the person who loses the largest percentage of body weight. It’s that simple.

Lest you think that I am supporting the producers of The Biggest Loser, I am not. I am asking you, dear reader, to open your eyes to the reality of this show.

Here is what The Biggest Loser is NOT about:

  • Health.

Here is what The Biggest Loser IS about:

  • Shaming fat people.
  • Promoting diet products.
  • Promoting other merchandise tie-ins.
  • Manipulating viewers into thinking that their show is “saving lives.”
  • Ruining the physical and mental health of contestants season after season.

Why The Biggest Loser Should Be Stopped {Read more}

{ 91 comments }

SUBSCRIBE

Sign up for your FREE weekly updates, special offers and free giveaways.

Plus, you'll get my Top 5 Tips For Consistently Feeling Great In Your Body.

Just enter your email below and click "subscribe."
+